A Change Gon’ Come...

For some people, wisdom, growth and change come with age. For others, it comes with experiences. For me, it’s been a little bit of both. I’m not the same person I was when I was a teen, I’m not the same person I was in my 20’s, not the same In my 30’s and so forth. Granted, my personality and who I am has never changed, but my choices, decisions, mentality, thought process, and priorities have. I’m not a perfect person and will never put on a front like I am or ever was one. I have made many mistakes in my life. I have learned a lot of lessons as well. It sucks to be a mistake prone human being, but hey, we were created by God, not by machines. I can’t change the past, but I can always change the present to help create a better future. To say “I don’t care” what people think is both true and false. I’ve spent years brushing the comments and thoughts of people I don’t care about off of my shoulder with no problem or hesitation. In fact, it more so fueled my fire and brought me this interesting joy that I had free rent space in their heads. To those I do care about though, that’s where my struggle has always been because I want to be seen in a positive light... a good light. I want those I love and care about to think the world of me. I don’t want them to look at me for what I’ve done or the mistakes I’ve made, but l want them to see me for what I do in the present and where my mentality and mindstate is.

Before he became Malcolm X, he was known as “Detroit Red”. He was a hustler, a thief, a drug dealer, a drug user... a convict. Sometimes, I wonder what he thought about when it came to those who still looked at him as “Detroit Red” or those who didn’t want to see him for who he became or if it even bothered him at all. He grew up, he wised up, he learned, he made better choices and decisions. He became a family man, a national influence, a man people looked up to and loved (or hated depending on what side of the coin you are/were on). Now, I never sold or did drugs or spent time in prison... my mistakes weren’t THAT heavy or even close, but my mistakes were more so on the emotional end and my actions were the cause of that, but thing is, I grew, I learned, I wised up, I made and make better choices and though you can’t change how people think or what people see, whether they see you how you want them to see you or not, you should never ever stop growing, stop learning, stop making the right choices, and taking the right paths. We’re human beings, we’re not perfect, but we can always take what we learn and experience and make the best out of the results. Some may embrace it, some may not, but you can’t let that affect your forward progress because if you do, are you really changing and becoming a better person for the “right” reasons? The right people will always embrace you and those are the one’s who matter most. If no one embraces you, then, well, sometimes, like they say “it’s lonely at the top”. No need to climb down, though. Stay in your position and feel good about your progression.